It's probably not something to laugh at but, today getting off the metro, I saw the most incompetent seeing eye dog ever. The poor lady. The dog gets off the metro and then starts walking toward a wall... Then she had to turn it around and lead it to stairs. The damn mutt looked like it was afraid of the stairs. She had to pull it up the stairs. Quite frankly I think she would have been better off without it. The thing had no idea where it was going. And you should have seen that hang dog expression on its face. You know when someone does something really stupid they have this look on their face, "Oh, my bad."
If only the dog could talk. Maybe it would be more hostile and look less oppressed.
Blind Lady: "Walk up the stairs you stupid bitch!"
Dog: "Who are you calling a bitch, whore? Another outburst like that and I'll leave your white ass right here, I swear to Dog I will! I mean, I swear to God! Where the hell are we supposed to be going anyway? The depanneur? F**k that s**t, I'm going to the dog park... You can come if you want."
It raises a few questions. How do you get a totally useless seeing eye dog? I mean, who's responsible? Did they just get lazy like Professors at a bad school? I could see the trainer doing a test run of the dog. It starts meandering over train tracks and into manholes. Starts likcing itself in the middle of a highway. It pees on the guy walking it. Then the trainer decides, "Meh... Good enough! It's just a dog after all. A+!!!"
That would be the ultimate practical joke. Replace some guy's seeing eye dog, with some kind of retarded rottweiler. The guy leaves his house and the dog leads him out to bum effing nowhere, with nothing but cacti and tumbleweeds all around him. The following week his friends see him on the side of a milk carton and laugh their asses off. "That was the best! Even better than the time we replaced his guinea pig with a lobster!!!!"
*coming soon* pics from Pam/Dave's party.
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