Last Thursday was fun. On my way to lunch I smelled gas. Apparently, while building the foundation for the new Genomics Center at Concordia, the construction workers hit a gas line. It smelled a lot like the gas used to light our Bunsen burners meaning it was potentially explosive gas. A fleet of fire trucks and a few cop cars showed up and soon the entire school was closed off! With my laptop and all my work stuck inside!
It was a gift... Like a snow day when you're a kid... Or when you're digging through trash and find a hot dog that's only half eaten. There's nothing like an impromptu day off. So Hayline and I went to a lebanese restaurant called Amir. I giggled to myself and pointed out the menu to Hayline. "Look Hayline! They serve Rice, Potatoes and Homos with every combo!" (Riz, Patates et Homos). Clearly someone tried to translate humus into french and in a fortuitous turn of events forgot the 'u'.
Me: "I'll have a mixed plate."
Lebanese guy: "Would you like some homos with that???"
Me: "No, thank you."
Lebanese guy: "There's nothing like the taste of homos in your mouth!"
Me: "No, I'm good."
Lebanese guy: "Don't be a homosphobe!! It's a delicious, creamy treat in the mouth!!!"
Then I secretly go off and dip all my food in delicious homos sauce, "I wish I knew how to quit you, Homos..."
What's really funny is... who puts hummus on the menu? Isn't that like putting ketchup or mustard? Besides, they didn't mention that the combo also comes with garlic sauce. It's almost as if putting Homos all over the menus was deliberate.
Speaking of Homos, I got a chance to flick through the channels watching daytime television. Has anyone seen the show Chris and Steve? It's a talk show featuring two gay guys. The hilight of that was after examining which flowers are most conducive to feng sui in the house, the pair (at this point wearing matching aprons with their names on it) were decorating a piece of wall with some kind of lacker. Gingerly holding their tools, one of them messed up the project, and ran off with his hands on his hips, pouting and whining like a child with a stereotypical lisp. Hayline then asked, "How do you know they're gay?" I don't know, just a hunch.
We then watched the brilliant show, "Community", where the Black guy confirmed my suspicion which is that Black people are allowed to be homophobic. (Nuff Respek, Isaiah Washington!)
Anyway, keep up the good work Concordia Construction workers. We have a four day weekend coming up, care to make it 5? Just don't light any matches near the next "accident".