Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Movie Title

Is it just me or have the titles to movies become increasingly simplistic? These days movies go for the simplest, 1 word title that would best describe the movie. There is no irony, they're never tongue in cheek. In the near future we have a movie coming out called 'Buried', about a guy who is buried. There's 'Faster' starring the Rock. I imagine the Rock does stuff faster than one normally would. At least there must be some kind of acceleration in the film. Just now I saw the trailer for 'Devil'. I think it's about Rosie Odonnel. And remember Phone Booth? About a guy in a phone booth, being held hostage?

I wonder if they come up with the story first, or just a title. We tried it the other day at lunch. The movie is called 'Kayak.' The trailer would be a guy kayaking and then a cell phone would ring. Anthony Hopkins would be on the other end. "Tyler, if you would look underneath the blanket in your kayak..." And then the guy, (Sam Worthington I guess) would look under the blanket and find a bomb. Anthony Hopkins would then explain, "If you stop paddling, then the Kayak will explode... Also, the Kayak is heading toward a waterfall."

This theatres... kayking... is.... very dangerous...

Then Sam Worthington would cry out, "WHAT DO YOU WANT?!" and Anthony Hopkins would say, "Just keep paddling for now..."

The ending is obvious. Anthony Hopkins wants revenge on Sam Worthington because as a child, Hopkins was sexually abused by Worthington's dad who was a catholic priest.
Rated R for nudity, coarse language and a troubling scene featuring a grizzly bear.

Wednesday, September 08, 2010

Master Chef

I don't often turn on the television and watch whatever's on, but I just finished watching Master Chef. I didn't think I could ever enjoy watching a compettitive, cooking reality show, but it was freaking tense. I'm not a particularly ambitious person, so to see people excelling at anything is awesome to me. I love food, I even like cooking, but I can't imagine putting the time and effort that these people have invested into their craft, to be an excellent chef.

There are people crying and freaking out. "Ooooh snap!!! Did he just put salt on a soufflee???" Yes... he did. And I'm wondering... Is that bad?

I'm told Gordon Ramsay is... someone I should know. Watching the show he's the cooking world's answer to Simon Cowell, an obnoxious, mercurial Brit who doesn't hesitate to make people feel like garbage for dramatic effect. One of the other judges on the show simply said of a dish, "This is bad..... It's bad as a dessert.... It would be bad as breakfast." Then he threw his fork down with no small measure of contempt.

OUCH! But i was hooked from that moment on. It's fun to live in a world where everyone has different passions. I mean, no matter how many hours, how many years you put into becoming the ultimate chef, the product is so transient. If there's one thing the perfect soufflee and a Big Mac have in common, it's that after they're eaten, their destiny is the toilet. A reeking, brown log riding waves of sewage until the end of time... Or at least until a rat eats it. Is it just me, or can I be just as happy after eating a Big Mac trio for 8$, as I could eating a 100$ carefully prepared masterpiece? Not to say I don't like eating fancy from time to time... It's just one of those oddities of our culture. There are people in this world paid to harshly judge how carefully ingredients are put together on a few ounces of food, and other people who would be lucky to eat that amount of food in a week. Just a thought.