A pore post

I don't know if I'm the only one, but dry air requires me to apply a layer of moisturizing lotion to my skin after showering in the morning or risk the whitenning of the skin that we black people call ashiness!

The problem is, living in a household with only women, when lotion is bought, sometimes little old me is forgotten and we can get some pretty feminine lotions. The result is I go to school smelling like lavender or strawberry's or some other damn thing.

The other morning I saw a new product. A short distance away I couldn't quite read the label but I feared the worst. "Just great!" I thought, "Another lotion that'll have me smelling like a sexy woman!" But this lotion didn't have a perfumed odor. It had something called "subtle skin reflectors". It was supposed to make my skin look somehow shinier. Even worse than smelling like a pansy! I couldn't go out into the world shimmering like Tinkerbell or some other form of mythical sprite. Or shining like C-3PO.... Or... some other metallic character like... Oh, I don't know... Robocop?

... Mmm... That's kind of cool.

I looked around to make sure no one was watching, and applied the lotion. Off to school I went, glistenning like (insert name of absurdly shiny thing here) Sure enough if I looked closely I could see little sparkling things on my skin. And sure enough, the hotties of montreal responded! "Wow, Chris! Your skin is irridescent like a perfectly cut diamond! I want you!!!"

This post was brought to you by Jergens Moisturizing lotion with Subtle Skin Reflectors. It's like a gangsta rapper's bling... for your pores!!!